Eddie Howe checked into Forty Towers – but instead of gourmet night, it was gormless night at the Vitality.
On Howe’s 40th birthday, it was chilly enough at the seaside to use the candy floss as cavity wall insulation, and Bournemouth served up a dish best forgotten for their frustrated manager.
Howe was on parade by 6.30am as usual at the Vitality stadium, going through set piece permutations and poring over video analysis, without opening his presents and cards.
If he had as much fun blowing out the candles on his cake when he got home, the kitchen would have caught fire.
Bullied by Kiwi battering ram Chris Wood and outplayed in midfield, Bournemouth were poor from start to finish.
As for Sean Dyche’s high-flying Clarets, please do not adjust your sets: That is Burnley above Tottenham in the Premier League table.
Wood announced himself with an early looping header against the bar before another perfunctory dip of his brow needed the intervention of Cherries keeper Asmir Begovic’s fingertips.
Then Steve Cook threw himself full-length to block Jeff Hendrick’s close-range shot as the Clarets carved out the best chances in an assertive first half display.
But Bournemouth’s luck ran out when Robbie Brady’s cross-shot took a helpful deflection into Wood’s path and Burnley’s record £15 million signing made no mistake from five yards, his sixth goal of the season.
Don’t fall for the lazy propaganda that Burnley are long-ball merchants.
Too often they are damned with the language of faint praise - direct, physical, hard-working – but here they were vibrant, inventive and progressive.
Never were those virtues better illustrated than Republic of Ireland winger Brady’s 20-yard rocket to double the Clarets’ advantage 20 minutes after the break.
Johann Gudmundsson, darting in off the right flank, teed him up and Brady’s right-foot missile soared beyond Begovic.
To their credit, Bournemouth didn’t throw in the towel and 11 minutes from time, sub Jermain Defoe’s cross-shot fell kindly for Josh King to set up a lively finish.
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