Former England and Manchester United star Rio Ferdinand has opened up for the first time about his heartbreak over his wife's death.

Rebecca died of breast cancer 18 months ago leaving the former England defender and captain to raise their three kids alone.

In a rare insight into the ex-Manchester United & West Ham player's personal life he posted on Facebook last night/Sunday: "I don’t often share how I’m feeling but the last couple of years have changed my thinking… and I’ve written a book about that called Thinking Out Loud."

The 38-year-old became a professional in his sport when he was just 15 and he says that for more than 20 years he "showed no weakness" but promises to show his softer side in his autobiography.

Ferdinand is now working as a pundit on BT Sport (
Image:
BT Sport)
The former England international has opened up about the tragic loss (
Image:
Rex Features)

He added: "I used to think I was too tough to fall apart. I became a professional footballer at 15 and for more than 20 years showed no weakness.

"People said I was cold but that didn’t bother me because feelings don’t help you win. They get in the way of your game.

"Then in May 2015 my world collapsed. My wife Rebecca died of breast cancer, leaving me to bring up our three kids on my own. My heart was broken and my kids needed me to help them.

"I thought football had a powerful impact on people but nothing I ever did on the pitch came close to the documentary I made for the BBC about losing Rebecca…

"It’s the hardest thing I have ever done and I’m still learning from it… Every day strangers come up to tell me their stories of losing loved ones.

"We’re all trying so hard to keep up a brave face when what need to do is lower our guard!!

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"So I’ve written this book called Thinking Out Loud because that was one of Rebecca’s favourite songs and because after bottling everything up it’s what I do now.

"Writing it made me dig deep and confront why I find talking about how I feel so hard… I never dreamt I’d be grieving again now but in July my darling mum died of cancer too.

"It’s been terrible for my family and me but if I can help others it won’t feel totally meaningless.

"The book comes out in October and I hope it can reach everyone who has lost somebody and help them manage."

Rio's new book Thinking Out Loud: Love, Grief and Being Mum and Dad comes out on October 5.